Full power, 24 hour!

September 14, 2008

Sat, 13 Sep 2008 17:09:20

Full power, twenty-four hour!

Communal breakfast at Durga’s, Dorien orders up momos – a Tibetan vegetarian dumpling affair that takes some preparation. It transpires that everyone knows the plan from the off, so I must have been concentrating on my food last night when the itinerary was hatched. Always the last to know….We’re not halfway down the high street with the living temple Virupaksha as our backdrop when we stop for coffee – turns out Eyal is an afficionado – and this is the only place that does a proper espresso – he has pictures of real coffee and cakes stored on his camera from somewhere up north – to remind him of when he found the cake oasis in the coffee desert. Strange fella. I haven’t drunk coffee for twenty years because the stuff gave me insomnia for over a decade and that’s a long time…..when you want to sleep; still, I’m not bitter about it. I settle on a maaza – bright orange pseudo-mango ‘juice’, mix it with a bottle of soda water and spark up a fag. My body is a temple. Its been a half-hour so I head back to pick up the now-ready momos, trundle back and off we set – maybe an hour behind an ideal schedule but still timely for a full days derring-do.

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High river blues

August 31, 2008

Sun, 31 Aug 2008
It could be that with the conclusion to my last missive, i somehow gave the impression that my life revolves around alcohol.Nothing could be further from the truth – and am I not a lover of truth? In fact my life revolves around the spiritual path and how to get back on it, being non-judgemental, charitable good works, getting laid in a psychologically sustainable fashion (or indeed any fashion)and desisting from masturbation when I fail at all of the above. Just so’s we’re clear.
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The hippy chicks will have to wait…..

August 30, 2008

Sat, 30 Aug 2008
The journey was mildly discomforting, the aroma of the days 1st shit overpowering, the station at Gotankpal arid and threatening, the bus station beggar women the most tenacious ever seen, the bus ride Dante-esque and Hospet an anal haemorrhage in an oasis of shit. Got the picture?
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Last night in Mumbai……….escape from the big shitty

August 19, 2008

busted my chops, as they say somewhere (it was a long time ago) to get this one to you by pub time on Sunday……but what can you do?

‘You shameless fuck’, I think to myself, having ordered a pot of tea at the Taj Mahal (Rs250) in surroundings so luxurious you have a choice…..you can slink away like a prairie dog after the lions have made their kill,…. or you can straighten your backbone and recall your headmaster saying ‘god helps those who helps themselves’ – or if you come from California – ‘fake it till you make it’. Like you belong there………
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Street Fight!

August 10, 2008

Sun, 10 Aug 2008 15:31:46

So I’m coming back from Cafe Mondegar, 2nd most famous place on the Causeway, with a skinful on board, which has taken the edge off spending the entire day roasting my balls trying to get the phone to work.Some of you will recognize this is becoming something of a trend. No matter, I’m on my way home looking forward to a cold shower, a drink of warm water and a typically sleepless night – thats how it is, them’s the breaks.
I step onto the junction corner at Leopold’s that is the only happening spot at kicking-out time, and this teenage punk who has just turned the key on his Bhajaj Bullet (nice gastank, pseudo-Harley affair) is getting ready to pull away from the kerb. ‘Get outta my way’ he says, adding that subtle little lift of the nose and jaw (feel free to practise in the mirror) that says ‘ I have more coolth than you, I recognise you as food for my ego and may command you as I wish’…..or something.
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the Mumbai mobile phone farce

July 20, 2008

Sun, 20 Jul 2008 12:53:08

Opposite the side door to Leopold works the teenage mobile simcard wallah: his shop, like many, is a cupboard on the wall and counter frontage about 3foot long and 8 inches deep. My extensive market research reveals AIRTEL to be a go. You didn’t think I was gonna go with Vodafone did you? – how I love a company that not only embodies, but enshrines the philosophy of customer as ‘the least important part of the equation’. Fuck ‘em!
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some crappy soap opera……

July 19, 2008

Mon, 14 Jul 2008 16:05:29

Not going to become a filmstar by drinking cobra at Leopolds, so I thought I’d pull my finger out. Did a 2nd day on the ā€˜30s-based tv soap –’Monay rana dey’ we think its called – walking past the camera, sitting at the tables pretending to converse as the camera pans over you before closing in on the principals, that sort of thing. Much sitting around, sweating of the pink bits.
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trivial pursuits……

July 19, 2008

Sun, 6 Jul 2008 23:19:06

so I’m in this car, little fiat 1100 put-put, prolly from the ’50s – tho it could pass for the ’30s which is just as well.Dave the Canadian charter pilot is driving – we’re leaving a swanky joint called ‘the elite club’. – wearing ’30s gear.As instructed, we slow to a halt for the gates to open, we react to something sailing down in front of the gates – just have time to turn to Dave and mouthe..’oh fuc…KABOOM! – louder than i expected, i feel the heatflash on the windscreen.
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Base camp lassitude…..

July 19, 2008

Sun, 22 Jun 2008 16:56:51

11 days in, sports bag performing well,atm situation good, washkit ideal, clothes selection damn-near perfect, hat still pristine, the beer has doubled in price!
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